This page has been medically reviewed by Dr Marielle Quint, March 2025.
Self-harm is when a child or teenager intentionally hurts themselves as a way to cope with overwhelming emotions, stress, or mental health difficulties. It may be a sign that they are struggling to express or manage what they’re feeling inside. While self-harm is not always linked to suicidal intent, it is a serious issue that requires understanding, support, and professional care.
Self-harm can take many forms, and signs may be physical, emotional, or behavioural. Some young people may hide their injuries or avoid talking about it.
Physical signs
Unexplained cuts, bruises, scratches, or burns (often on arms, thighs, or stomach)
Scars in patterns or repeated injuries in the same areas
Wearing long sleeves or trousers, even in hot weather
Hair loss from pulling or signs of skin-picking
Bite marks or signs of punching themselves
Emotional and behavioural signs
Avoiding situations where skin might be exposed (e.g., swimming, changing)
Withdrawing from friends and family or becoming more isolated
Mood swings, irritability, anxiety, or emotional numbness
Expressing feelings of worthlessness, guilt, or shame
Frequently making excuses for injuries
Keeping sharp objects or self-harm tools nearby
Engaging in risky behaviours, including substance use
Psychological signs
Intense feelings of distress, tension, or emotional overwhelm
A sense of temporary relief or control after self-harming
Trouble expressing emotions verbally or coping with difficult experiences
Thoughts of self-harm as a way to “punish” themselves or escape
There is no single cause, but common reasons include:
Emotional regulation difficulties
Bullying, low self-esteem, or body image issues
Academic pressure or social stress
Trauma, grief, or abuse
Anxiety, depression, or other mental health difficulties
Identity struggles, including gender identity or sexuality
Understanding the underlying causes is key to offering the right support.
Support focuses on helping the young person find safer, healthier ways to cope with distress.
Professional therapy
Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) – Helps children understand the link between their thoughts, feelings, and actions, and develop new coping strategies
Dialectical behaviour therapy (DBT) – Supports emotional regulation, distress tolerance, and building a ‘toolbox’ of healthy coping techniques
Trauma-informed therapy – If the self-harm is linked to past experiences
Psychodynamic or integrative therapy – May be helpful for older teenagers with more complex emotional needs
Family support and education
Guidance for parents on how to respond calmly and supportively
Family therapy to improve communication and reduce shame or conflict
Psychoeducation to reduce stigma and increase understanding
Safety planning
Identifying triggers and early warning signs
Developing alternatives to self-harm
Creating a crisis or safety plan tailored to the child’s needs
Medication
In some cases, medication may be prescribed to manage underlying conditions such as depression, anxiety, or trauma-related symptoms.
At Kidswell Health, our in-house team of experienced child psychologists and therapists provides sensitive and expert care for young people who self-harm. We offer a safe, non-judgemental space to explore difficult emotions and develop healthy coping strategies — with no need for external referral.
If you’re worried your child may be self-harming, contact Kidswell Health for compassionate support and guidance.
Harmless – Support for those who self-harm and their families
Papyrus UK – Prevention of young suicide
If your child is in immediate danger or crisis, call emergency services or visit Mind’s crisis guide.
Book an appointment with one of our experienced professionals today.
Stay up to date with our latest news.
