Back to school anxiety: tips from a child psychologist

How to support your child through changes and transitions

By Dr Georgia Meisel, Child Psychologist at Kidswell Health

The return to school after summer can bring mixed emotions for children and parents alike. For some children, it’s an exciting fresh start. For others, the thought of new teachers, classrooms, and routines stirs up worry and anxiety.

Back to school anxiety is common and affects children of all ages. Whether your child is starting school for the very first time, moving up to secondary, or preparing for life after GCSEs, each transition comes with its own challenges, as well as opportunities for growth.

At Kidswell Health, our team of child psychologists support families through these important milestones. We’ve created a 3-part back to school series to help you understand what your child may be experiencing and share practical, age-specific tips.

But first, let’s look at why children can feel anxious about going back to school, and some general strategies that can help at any age.

Why children experience back to school anxiety

• Fear of the unknown: New classrooms, teachers, and routines can feel daunting.
  
• Separation from parents: Especially in younger children, being apart for long stretches can trigger worry.
  
• Academic pressures: Older children may worry about homework, exams, or performance.
  
• Social changes: Making new friends or maintaining existing friendships can be stressful.
  
• Change in routine: After the freedom of holidays, the structure of school can feel restrictive.

Tips to ease back to school anxiety

These strategies apply across all ages and can help children feel calmer and more prepared:

1. Re-establish routines early

Start easing back into school bedtimes, wake-ups, and mealtimes a week or two before term begins. Predictability helps children feel more secure.

2. Acknowledge their feelings

It’s important not to dismiss worries. Reassure your child that feeling nervous is normal, and share times when you felt anxious about something new but managed it.

3. Visit or visualise the school

Walking past the school gates, looking at pictures online, or talking through what the day will look like helps children picture the environment and reduces uncertainty.

4. Encourage independence

Whether it’s packing a school bag, organising homework, or making their own packed lunch, small responsibilities build confidence and reduce anxiety.

5. Keep communication open

Ask open-ended questions such as “What are you most looking forward to?” or “Is there anything that feels tricky?” This shows you’re there to listen and makes it easier for your child to share their worries.

6. Focus on positives

Talk about the exciting aspects of school, such as seeing friends, trying new activities, or learning something fun. Balancing worries with positives can shift perspective.

7. Balance rules with freedom

Going back to school often means adjusting to lots of rules and less freedom to choose what they want to do. Setting aside around 10 minutes of “special time” during the week, where your child leads the play or conversation, can give them space to feel in control. This helps strengthen your connection and creates a balance alongside the structure of school life.

Explore our Back to School series

Every child’s experience is unique, and different ages bring different challenges. Our child psychologists have created three guides with tailored tips for each stage:

• Starting big school: Helping your child feel ready for primary (Nursery → Primary)
  
• Moving up: Supporting your child’s transition to secondary school (Primary → Secondary)
  
• Big steps: Helping your teenager manage the leap beyond secondary school (Secondary → College, University, Apprenticeships or Work)
  

When to seek extra help

It’s normal to feel a little worried or anxious about new starts and big changes in life. Most children settle into their new school routine within a few weeks. But if your child’s anxiety is severe, persistent, or interfering with daily life, such as sleep problems, frequent stomach aches, or refusal to attend school, professional support can help.

At Kidswell Health, our child psychologists work with children and families to develop coping strategies and make transitions smoother.

Book an appointment today