How to Stay Calm When Your Child Won’t Turn Off The Screen

What to do when your child won’t turn off the TV or iPad

By Dr Georgia Meisel, Child Psychologist at Kidswell Health

How to Stay Calm During TV Binges (and What Actually Helps)

Screens are a part of modern family life. But screen-time binges can bring out guilt, frustration, and power struggles in even the calmest households. If you’ve ever thought, “Why can’t they just switch it off?” or “I’ve created a screen monster!” — you’re not alone.

As psychologists, we’ve worked with many families navigating this terrain. Let’s explore why screen-time struggles happen, what actually helps, and how to stay calm in the moment.

👉 You might also like: How screen time affects children’s mental health

Why do kids binge TV?

For younger children, screens offer:

• Comfort and predictability
  
• Quick dopamine hits from fast-paced shows
  
• A way to self-soothe or escape boredom
  

For teens and tweens, screens may provide:

• Social connection (group gaming, messaging, TikTok)
  
• A sense of autonomy and identity
  
• A break from overwhelming academic or social pressures
  

So, if your child craves screens or struggles to switch off, it’s rarely about laziness or defiance. Often, they’re using screens to feel better regulated or more in control.

Let’s not forget: many apps and games are designed to keep us hooked — autoplay, infinite scroll, and dopamine-reward loops are features, not bugs.

It’s not a parenting failure. It’s how the tech is built.

What to do when your child is glued to the screen

For younger children:

In the moment: How to stay calm

1. Start with empathy, not threats
   Instead of “That’s it! No more TV all week,” try:

“You really wanted to keep watching. It’s so hard to stop something fun.”

2. Offer a bridge, not a cliff
   Stopping abruptly can feel like falling off an emotional cliff. Try:

• A visual timer or 5-minute countdown
  
• A sensory transition: “When the timer rings, we’ll have snack time.”
  
• A physical shift: “Let’s race to the kitchen!”
  

3. Avoid power struggles
   If you’re stuck in a loop of threats and pleas, pause. Take a breath.
   You can set firm boundaries and stay connected.
   

Outside the moment: What helps long-term

• Create predictable screen-time routines
  Use visual charts or “when–then” phrases:
  “When we’ve had lunch, then we’ll watch one episode.”
  
• Use screens as part of a balanced ‘diet’
  Like food, screen-time needs balance — mix in movement, connection, play, and rest.
  
• Name what the screen gives them
  “It looks like the tablet helps you calm down after nursery. Let’s find other calming things too, like bubbles or music.”
  

For teens and tweens:

1. Shift from control to collaboration
Teens are wired to seek independence. Work together on a screen agreement that covers:

• When and where screens are allowed
  
• Bedtime limits
  
• Family-wide boundaries (e.g., no phones at dinner)

💡 Try the free tech planner templates from Common Sense Media

2. Understand the emotional layer
Teens often use screens to:

• Cope with stress, low mood or anxiety
  
• Feel socially connected or in control
  
• Escape from pressure

Ask questions with curiosity, not judgment:

“What do you like about that game/show?”
“How do you feel after using it?”

3. Use screens as a window, not just a wall
Instead of seeing screens only as a barrier, use them to connect:

• Watch a show together
  
• Ask about their favourite YouTubers or creators
  
• Try a shared creative app or game

For parents and caregivers: Screens are not the enemy

Sometimes the TV is the babysitter while you cook, rest, or take that work call, and that’s okay.We’re not here to add guilt. We’re here to say: it’s about balance.

Aim for:

• Clear, compassionate limits
  
• Screens as one part of the day
  
• Ongoing, open conversations
  

What to say when your child melts down over screens

For younger children:

“You’re really sad TV is over. I get that. It’s time to turn it off, and I’ll help you do it.”

“It’s okay to feel upset. Let’s take three deep breaths and choose our next thing together.”

For teens:

“I know it’s frustrating when I ask you to stop. I’m not trying to control you, I want to help you feel your best.”

“Let’s work out a routine that gives you time to chill and time to do other things that matter.”

Final thoughts

Screen-time struggles aren’t a sign of failure — they’re a normal part of parenting in the digital age.
What matters most is how we connect with our children around screen time: with empathy, clarity, and consistency.

You’ve got this. And we’re here if you need support.

💬 Need support with screen-time, behaviour, or emotional regulation?
Our team of expert child psychologists and paediatricians can help.

📅 Book an appointment today to get tailored advice for your child and family.